Inside Jokes

           ESL Group Story Writing Class January 30, 2011
I was looking for a job; I was really desperate. An ad on the internet said: “Tour the world and make people happy.” I called and set up an interview.  They told me the job was in the produce department of a new, big supermarket in China.

On the airplane from Chicago, my city, to Fuxin, a man with a black suit, black sunglasses, and a black hat sat beside me and told me he was from the C.I.A. and he had a deal for me.

I was curious about the "deal." But the thing is that there was no deal. The man in the black suit had a gun with him!

I was concerned about the deal. Then I was fearful.I didn't know why the C.I.A. would need my help, because in China, there is no such secret agency.

And I was very afraid about the gun, because people were forbidden to use guns here.  But a gun was pointed at me.

I didn't have a chance and couldn’t do anything, I thought.  I asked him what he meant, and he said, “Help me search for a discount shopping group that is buying things in China.

I had a terrible fear of flying but now, also I had a cold gun pointed at my back.  The old lady who was sitting near me saw the man and his gun, and she started to shout: "Help, help, there's a hijacker here!"

Pumas in Kansas

                                      ESL Group Story Writing Class January 23 2011                      
Last summer, my car broke down during a cross-country trip from New York to California. I’m not sure exactly where I was when it broke down because my GPS and cell phone stopped working when my car stopped moving.

I do know that I was somewhere in the state of Kansas because I passed the Missouri/Kansas state-border-crossing sign about an hour before the breakdown.

I was starting to search for a gas station. I got out of my broken car and started to walk quickly. While I was walking I saw a sign. “Gas about 3 Miles” was written on the sign.

When I finally arrived at the gas station, I was really very tired and thirsty. An old man saw me and asked, “Hey stranger, how can I help you?”

I said, “I need help! My car is broken.” But in my mind I thought "I hope he can help me and I hope he doesn’t do bad things to me."

He just told me that he had tools and can repair my car, so I needed to get into his car, he said. I warned him not to do any bad things to me because I have a GPS and " if I disappear, the police will find me," I said.

 He turned to me with a puzzled look on his face and said, "Why would you think that I'll do bad things to you?" Then he winked and added, "I think you watch too many horror films, stranger."

So I reluctantly got into his car and pointed in the direction where we needed to go to get my car. As we neared my car, I noticed that something dark was moving inside of it.

Falon’s Precious Nightmare

                     ESL Group Story Writing Class January 16, 2011
 Falon was a very brave girl. Every Thursday night she would take a slow, long, stroll through the graveyard that has stood for over 200 years at the edge of the small village where she lived.

She was never afraid of anything. One day she decided to go into the jungle near the village where she lives.
She didn't think of herself as brave, she just wasn't afraid of the dead. She knew they are all around us. She could feel them in the jungle too.

She thought, "Maybe I can find something interesting in here." So she looked around for a special object, and she found a ring.

She found a ring and it was interesting. She suddenly said, “Ohhh my precious!"  It was a favorite object for her.

She wore that ring and something happened. She felt something burning in her body. Suddenly, her body turned red.

Even though her body felt as if it were on fire, she was calm (because she wasn't afraid of anything, after all).  She looked at her red hands and at her red arms. "Interesting," she thought. Then she saw a lake in the middle of the jungle.

She slowly walked over to the lake and looked down at her reflection that shone clearly on the flat surface of the water. Her entire body was glowing red.

While she was watching her reflection in the lake, she noticed something moving on her back. It was a long, red tail moving like a wild snake.

She started to learn how to control the tail.  She wanted to keep it hidden from view most of the time, but she also wanted to use it as a whip when necessary. In the jungle she became good at catching small animals. One day she was hunted by a terrible jungle lion…

One day she saw a boy go into the jungle and she tried to get to know him, but he saw a terrifying thing. So when he saw her, he ran away, very fast. That boy noticed the worse thing on earth. He ran so fast but he could not run away from Falon's arms.

She tried to say something to the boy but she couldn't. She opened her eyes and discovered that she was dreaming. She said, "Aw, it was a nightmare."
New Year’s Eve Melissa

                                              ESL Group Story Writing Class January 9, 2011
You won't believe what happened to me on New Year's Eve!  At 10 o'clock in the morning, I started celebrating by myself a bit early. I cracked open a bottle of champagne that someone had given me for Christmas, and took a swig right out of the bottle.

I started to drink champagne. It was a bit cold and snowing outside. My little kitten Angel and I were alone in the house. I started to watch the street from my window, while I was drinking. Suddenly, a car stopped in front of my house.

I didn't know what was happening but I think maybe someone went the wrong way down the street, so I didn't really want to know who was in that car.

A woman got out of the car. She was Melissa, a new colleague at work.  She was very pretty, but no one talked to her at the office because she said she liked to RP and to experiment with witchcraft.

She started to walk towards my door. She appeared to be looking directly at me through the window. Suddenly, I felt self-conscious about drinking so early in the morning, so I quickly took another gulp from the bottle and then shoved it beneath the table next to my chair. The doorbell rang.

I stood up to go to the door. I could hardly stand. She was smiling at me with her angelic face. I thought, "What luck! I'll not be alone this Christmas." She came into the house and gave me a package. "Take this, it's for you," she said. When she gave me the package her green eyes were sparkling like a puma.

I was very happy and I opened it. I found an HTC phone inside. I didn't know if this was a gift because there was no note inside. Was I missing some information?

Lost and Found

ESL Group Story Writing Class December 19, 2010
It was a dark and stormy night. I was walking down a road because my car had broken down, my phone battery had died and there was no one else traveling on that road. I saw a light in the trees of the forest on the side of the road. I went in towards the light.

I was standing there waiting for someone to do me a favor. Suddenly there was someone next to me offering to do me a favor. Without hesitating, I asked him for the favor. That person said, "How much you want to pay me?"

I was surprised because my wallet didn't have much money in it. I was so surprised because I didn't have much money to offer him. I decided to solve the problem myself, and I kept walking in the forest.  Suddenly, I noticed a strange light behind the trees.

A big strange disk looked dazzling. It looked like a space ship. I thought that I should run but I couldn't move. Maybe I never saw this strange thing happening.

The big space ship sucked me up into it and I saw some animals. My face turned red because I was afraid and I urinated on myself.


ESL Group Story Writing Class December 12, 2010
I always wanted to have a pet for myself --especially a cocktail parrot-- because I think they are smart animals, for a bird. One day when I was walking down the street, I saw a white cocktail parrot in the pet shop window.

But when I saw the price, I thought, "Wow, it's so expensive!" So I thought that maybe I could buy two eggs and watch them be born.

As I was walking away with the two eggs I heard a noise. I turned back and I saw the cocktail parrot thumping against the glass, like he wanted to call me back. So I went back to the store. The owner of the store opened the door. “Welcome back" He said.

I walked up to the parrot's cage and before I could do or say anything, the parrot said, "And where did you think you were going with my babies?" I wasn't shocked to hear the parrot talk, because I knew parrots could talk, but I was surprised at what the parrot had said.  I answered, "I just wanted to take them home with me to watch them hatch."  The bird started to cry so I went to the owner.

So I asked the seller how much the bird was. He said, "Hey man, if you want to buy it, I can give him to you for free. But are you sure you want him?

Yes I want him," I said, but in my mind I thought "OO don't buy him, you will become poor!" But I couldn't control my mouth, so I really needed to work hard...

As I was walking home with the bird, in a cage covered by a black cloth --which was sold to me by the pet store owner, and not at a discount price-- I asked myself why I had such a negative thought in my mind, After all, I was just  taking the "mother" of the eggs home with me to my family of six brothers.

But I couldn't figure out why I kept thinking that it was a bad idea to take these eggs to my home.  I pushed the worrisome thoughts out of my head and continued on my way home.